My brother got married on this day, 25 years back.
Yes, it is the silver anniversary of my relationship with my 'Bhabhi'.
Simple, pretty, innocent. Those were my first impressions of her.
Back then, all that mattered to me was that I was getting a friend within the family, someone my own age who I, a newly-wed myself, could bond with, over common post-marital experiences.
Well, we did bond over that and over babies and over movies and clothes and what not.
25 years of togetherness has rubbed off on me in many welcome ways.
Whereas I, as dictated by my sun sign, always take the melancholic view of situations, she brings in a fresh and light perspective. I have learned to drop my serious facade once in a while and laugh my heart out, especially while watching movies. Whereas I wilt at any show of anger, she effortlessly cracks a joke and moves on. With Bhabhi around, there is no way that we two stuffy pretentious siblings can stay serious and unsmiling for long. There is always a light fluffy joke around the corner!
Bhabhi shows immense gentleness and patience around young children and around the sick. In the days when I was a young mom, I could be very demanding and exacting. But from her, I learned to give in and pamper my children, going to the extent of pressing their legs off and on. All sickness disgruntles me like nothing else.I become irritable and sullen. But Bhabhi has always been the best person to have around when one is sick. She is gentleness personified, a true Florence Nightingale.
Another area of my life where I try and model myself after her is in my role as a daughter-in-law. Bhabhi has been the most perfect daughter-in-law to my parents. Each set of parents have their own idiosyncrasies and mine had their entire gamut. But Bhabhi has always known how to be there for both of them, investing a lot of herself in their well-being. She was the daughter that my mom always wanted me to be. They both sat and chatted and joked like best pals. Bhabhi could talk to my mom about her husband's, i.e. my brother's shortcomings and my mom added 20 more to the list. When Bhabhi gave him an earful about something, my mom cheered for her. Absolutely smashing trend-setting 'mil-dil' relationship. Except that I hardly found space for myself between them. What I could take solace in was that each one of them confided in me when they had a tiff with each other. Thank God for tender mercies!
With a strong foundation for our relationship having been laid in the early years, we were able to weather the troubled waters of my parents' illnesses and their respective demise. Misunderstandings and insecurities surfaced but we were able to put them aside. My brother's home is now my 'maika' and I am welcome to stay in it even in their absence. What more can a sister ask for!
Today as my Bhaiya and Bhabhi celebrate 25 years of their love and togetherness, I only wish them lots and lots of love to go around. Well that is sort of selfish, because I know that some part of that love is going to come round and wrap me too in its cozy warmth.
Love you Bhabhi and Bhaiya.
Happy 25th Wedding Anniversary!
Yes, it is the silver anniversary of my relationship with my 'Bhabhi'.
Simple, pretty, innocent. Those were my first impressions of her.
Back then, all that mattered to me was that I was getting a friend within the family, someone my own age who I, a newly-wed myself, could bond with, over common post-marital experiences.
Well, we did bond over that and over babies and over movies and clothes and what not.
25 years of togetherness has rubbed off on me in many welcome ways.
Whereas I, as dictated by my sun sign, always take the melancholic view of situations, she brings in a fresh and light perspective. I have learned to drop my serious facade once in a while and laugh my heart out, especially while watching movies. Whereas I wilt at any show of anger, she effortlessly cracks a joke and moves on. With Bhabhi around, there is no way that we two stuffy pretentious siblings can stay serious and unsmiling for long. There is always a light fluffy joke around the corner!
Bhabhi shows immense gentleness and patience around young children and around the sick. In the days when I was a young mom, I could be very demanding and exacting. But from her, I learned to give in and pamper my children, going to the extent of pressing their legs off and on. All sickness disgruntles me like nothing else.I become irritable and sullen. But Bhabhi has always been the best person to have around when one is sick. She is gentleness personified, a true Florence Nightingale.
Another area of my life where I try and model myself after her is in my role as a daughter-in-law. Bhabhi has been the most perfect daughter-in-law to my parents. Each set of parents have their own idiosyncrasies and mine had their entire gamut. But Bhabhi has always known how to be there for both of them, investing a lot of herself in their well-being. She was the daughter that my mom always wanted me to be. They both sat and chatted and joked like best pals. Bhabhi could talk to my mom about her husband's, i.e. my brother's shortcomings and my mom added 20 more to the list. When Bhabhi gave him an earful about something, my mom cheered for her. Absolutely smashing trend-setting 'mil-dil' relationship. Except that I hardly found space for myself between them. What I could take solace in was that each one of them confided in me when they had a tiff with each other. Thank God for tender mercies!
With a strong foundation for our relationship having been laid in the early years, we were able to weather the troubled waters of my parents' illnesses and their respective demise. Misunderstandings and insecurities surfaced but we were able to put them aside. My brother's home is now my 'maika' and I am welcome to stay in it even in their absence. What more can a sister ask for!
Today as my Bhaiya and Bhabhi celebrate 25 years of their love and togetherness, I only wish them lots and lots of love to go around. Well that is sort of selfish, because I know that some part of that love is going to come round and wrap me too in its cozy warmth.
Love you Bhabhi and Bhaiya.
Happy 25th Wedding Anniversary!
Muaahh..god bless both of you and touchwood.. I m all watery eyed..m sure u were too while penning this down..may your love always flourish..
ReplyDeleteBack here after a long time.. you always sound honest and grounded.
ReplyDeleteHappy New Year
ReplyDeleteWhile it is absurd to reject medical science, the principal factor in overcoming illness is the patient and his or her “life force.” In medical terms, it is our capacity to heal ourselves. Life force is a mystic phenomenon that transcends human understanding.